driving sitting
relaxing
sleeping
sometimes
Grampa Sam in front
driving smiling
relaxed in his Taurus
cruising
being free just
him and the road
four wheels
and his grandkids
me
Ch. 1
up to Cherry Hill
to spend the weekend
to hang out
to relax
to play with the computers
to go to Ponzios
the diner
and eat cinnamon rolls
and lox
and vegetable
barley stew
and Gramps
Grampa Sam
hitting on the waitresses
and giving them good tips
on life
filled with infinite wisdom
and a smile
always smiling
Ch. 2
And I’m off to College
Delaware
for four years
close but
still
there
to visit
on occasion
Grampa Sam
and him me
Ch. 3
and at the UofC
Chicago
freezing
far away
calling him
occasionally
how are you doing
still smiling
reminding me
not to let the bastards
grind me down
Ch. 4
Back finally
I’m sorry I was away so long
I wasn’t thinking about it
much
just doing what I was told
what I thought I was
supposed to do
Ch. 5
I know Grandma’s
there but I can’t
bear to see her
with her Alzheimer’s
and she’s gone
too
where was I then?
Ch. 6
That Jewish senior
citizen’s home
home for the elderly
with the terrible
lunches and dinners
but the staff
was friendly for the
most part
Grampa Sam
watching tv
trying to make the
best of an increasingly
bad situation
that is life
past 90
so close
so it seams
Ch. 7
Struggling fighting
to hold on to
pull it together
daughters coming
going
whatever
always smiling
with hat and cane
by his side
and I go and I stay
just for the night
and make sure he’s
OK that he can
get out of bed
and use the can
and everything
will be alright
Ch. 8
An hour away
should I go should I stay?
How many times?
Today?
Maybe tomorrow
maybe next week
visiting my grandfather
in Voorhees
Ch. 9
and then its getting
really serious
all of a sudden
the pain is getting
to be too much
in his shoulder
in his body
the cancer
eating away slowly
he needs medication
the wheelchairs
and canes and crutches
won’t do any longer
it’s not enough
he can’t come with
me to Ponzios
to the diner
not anymore
those days are gone
funny
it all happens
so quickly
Ch. 10
I go
I know
I send my Dad
he always liked him
I can’t go
I wait
to hear the reports
Ch. 11
and then I’m there
and I see him
and he can’t speak anymore
no words
there’s too much drugs
running through his blood
the pain is just too much
for him
and I sit there at his bed
and I hold his hand
and he holds mine
and we look at each other
in the eye
and we know
Ch. 12
and I go I get in my car
and I have that feeling
that would be the last
time I would see him
and its raining
and I’m going down
295
and there’s that curve
ahead
that I’ve gone around
so many times before
coming back from his
house in Cherry Hill
and now Voorhees
and I don’t think
about anything
I just go
and the rain
the rain
I’m thinking about him
Grampa Sam
in my mind
and I go
around the turn
and my wheels
take out from under
me
the car spinning
twirling whirling
hydroplaning
50 miles an hour
and then I
CRASH